For weeks, I’ve pondered upon what to bring to you, my reader; that which will help you as you journey through life more than I’ve been able to give so far. I have always posted what I have learned and I’m honoured to have you learn from me . However, I said to myself, “why don’t they learn from others as well?”.. it took me some time to put things together to bring you an amazing series, called , ” the brave series” it features amazing people who are fast growing and heading for the top.
Our first star is Olarinmoye Oluwamayowa, a student at the university of Lagos, model, fast growing writer and a lover of music and books .
She writes,
“When I was asked to write about my life story and how it has totally transformed me, I couldn’t pick a moment because a lot of things have happened to me in which aided in my growth.
Is it my insecurity? Fear of failing? Learning how to trust God ? Letting go of the need for people’s validation? My spirituality? It’s a lot but I’m going to focus on my insecurity and how I got past it.
Over 4 years ago, I was the girl who needed people’s validations. No day passed without me comparing myself to a fellow specie or without me asking someone if I was beautiful. Lol weird right? I know and funny how I’ve met people who went through the same phase too. But the truth is that’s what’s beautiful about our human self. – The ability to evolve, grow and let go of bad habits.
As I lived with my insecurity, a lot of thoughts creeped in as I also compared myself to people . I’d tell myself I was ugly. I needed people to tell me I was beautiful before actually believing it and even when they did, I thought they were lying and they just said it just to make me feel good.
You know, sometimes our thoughts are backed by so much insecurity, that they create lies we believe. Me being ugly was a lie I began to believe but fast forward to when I encountered God’s love like never before.
I remember when He (God) , asked how dare I call myself ugly because me calling myself ugly meant I was calling him ugly for HE created us in his image and likeness. He told me I was absolutely perfect the way I am and he made me exactly this way for a purpose ; I guess that’s why I model now lol.
Now, I don’t even want to change a thing about me and I don’t even need anyone to tell me I’m beautiful or I look good because all that matters is what God thinks about me. If I wake up every morning, waiting for a validation from a human like me, what’s going to happen if they don’t compliment me? I’d feel bad, so why would I want to dwell and rely on the words of individuals?
I’m beautiful because God says I am. I look good because God says I look good. I’m amazing because God thinks so too. I’m an imperfect perfection and that’s what makes me beautiful. The ability to embrace myself for who I am and to also embrace my flaws and my imperfections is what makes me beautiful.
Mr Odudu Essien, founder of Young Ecclesia Nation, who is also my spiritual father, played a big role in helping me get over my insecurities. He told me about the importance of early morning daily confessions. He encouraged me to look at myself in the mirror and say statements like “I am confident. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I am smart. I am of royal blood because I belong to the family of God”. Those statements absolutely helped purge me of my insecure thoughts.
Sometimes people come up to me and they say stuff like “oh I wish I had your body” and I tell them not to wish they did because they are absolutely perfect the way they are and the best person they could be really is their own self.
If you think you’re fat and it’s endangering to your health, then do the right thing by losing some weight but don’t let whatever negative stuff people tell you get to you because remember, it’s what God thinks about you that matters.
This is really a major story I can easily talk about because it’s a thing of the past and I’ve been able to overcome my major insecurity so I’m not ashamed to say I was an insecure individual. In fact, opening up about it reminds of the need to be confident and I’m grateful to God and the people who stood by me through this phase. Most importantly, I’m grateful to God for the woman I’m becoming. I can absolutely say I’m proud of my growth.
So beautiful people , Never compare yourself to anyone because it’s a battle you can never win. Do not underestimate yourself by comparing yourself to others. It’s our differences that make us unique and beautiful and always remember no one can make you inferior without your consent.
I really hope this little piece blessed you and if you’d like to ask questions or you need advice concerning this same issue or any issue at all, you could send me a dm on instagram or Twitter – @mayowaa_xo. God bless you always and forever.
Love May x”
Boye Paulina Sharon
20th November , 2018
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